“Mommy, turn the sun OFF!!!”

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Since my tiny daughter was old enough to express herself in sounds and words, she has been asking me to “turn the sun off”… yes, you read that correctly. Even as a toddler, we would get in the car, on our way to get her brother from school, run an errand, or head to my work, and in the highest-shrieking-ohmigosh the sky IS falling on us!-voice, she would plead with me, “Mommy! Turn the sun offffff!!!!”  Once we really hit the verbal stage of life, especially now that she is four and heading to 4K tomorrow, I was certain this request would disappear. You see, her brother, who is two years older than she, has also tried to help her with this “traumatic thing with the sun” while we’re in the car. He suggests she look out his window, cover her face with her blankie or her stuffed animal(s), and she responds indignantly, “I don’t want to! Make the sun move!” Yes, indeed, make the sun move… turn the sun off… move the car, Mommy, (while we are driving down a busy freeway, I’ll add) so that the sun is no longer in her eyes. Just so you know, we have tried hats, sunglasses, and a myriad of other things to “turn the sun off,” but they are never highly accepted in my tiny daughter’s world. 

And, I thought this phase of her little being had passed… until yesterday. On our way home from a playdate of scootering at the park with friends, we were all tuckered out, got on the interstate (mommy forgot about the pre-season game traffic – whoops!), and the familiar request returned, even with more articulation from her little verbal self, “Mom-my! The sun is in my eyes!!!!” 

In that moment was the perfect storm: busy traffic jammed and slammed to a halt on the bridge and we could smell the burning rubber from brakes that had been strained – my son offered to have her look out his window until the road curved and the sun was no longer in her eyes – I explained that we would soon be home and I still cannot turn the sun off at will – my children both were getting hungry and the sun was still a “problem-to-be-reckoned-with”…

I realized I will miss this phase of my daughter’s life. She won’t always ask me to “turn off the sun.” Even though she realizes now that I can’t do it for her, she still holds out some little idea that her mommy can do this for her and would do this for her if it was truly possible. And that’s the beautiful thing about our “sun in the car phenomenon”… she knows in her soul that if I could turn off that sun and make her life more comfortable, I would. That’s life as a parent. I find it utterly beautiful in moments like these.